Midweek Confessions [08.08.12]

• Uffda. I never update anymore, do I? This isn’t a confession. It’s a stating-the-obvious. And such it will be probably with all of my confessions today. This is really just more a list of things. Fun!

• So one reason I haven’t been updating is there is thing happening in our life that we’re not openly talking about that I want to talk about. It’s one of those things where it’s not a secret, but I’m not really talking about it either. It’s sort of keeping me away from here, because it’s all I want to write about! (And I confess that I know how annoying that is. Just bare with me. [Also, is it bear or bare?])

• It’s annoying when people talk about how busy they are, I know, but if you’ll just indulge me this one bullet point. Several huge work projects are all hitting at once, and did you know that I manage seven people now? So there’s that too, and then there’s that thing that I’m not talking about, but that I’m trying to also plan for, and all together it’s leaving me pretty overwhelmed. And when I get overwhelmed it manifests as anxiety and staying up too late and being tired and then too much coffee and also eating feelings.

Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, He says. But then I want to say, Do you not see how full my plate is? Do you not see how packed full my brain is?

• And that is why I am grateful for She Reads Truth, because it’s really gotten me in the daily discipline of reading scripture. The journal I’m currently using was started in 2010, and I have filled more pages in it since May than I did in the previous two years. I needed it so badly. I wish I could buy a new #SRT journal for everyone on my team, but that would be awkward for the one guy. Maybe I can get him a custom He Reads Truth moleskin. (That started as a joke, but maybe I could!)

• Sometimes when people comment that we didn’t wait that long till we were placed with Harry, I want to retort, “Only my whole life.”

• When the Internet doesn’t work right I sometimes want to go bananas on it. The other day I was just trying to log in to Walgreen’s to print the 80237 pictures for the weeks and weeks in which I am behind in Project Life, and their site kept sending me on some kind of password log in loop, and I was seriously seconds away from a Hulk Smash scenario. Nonfunctioning technology is my temper trigger. Why is that?

• Harry is at a pretty amazing age. He’s also at that age where his little tantrums are still comical and kind of cute, but I know that stage is passing rapidly. Soon they’ll just be embarrassing and nerve fraying. I’ve been trying the Karp technique of “Harry mad! Harry’s mad that mommy won’t give him her keys!” But I feel like a crazy person when I do it, and I also sort of feel like I’m mocking him. I know that I’m not, not really, but there’s something in the way he looks at me when I do it. (Maybe I’ve been reading too much @HonestToddler.)

Your turn. Confess something. Join me in Crazytown, won’t you?